Thursday, June 13, 2013

Bachelorette Des- Episode 2

Hey guys, thanks for sticking around!  Let the dates begin-Week 2 of the Bachelorette

Chris Harrison enters the bachelor house, a new table this year, anyone else think it looks like the table of Westeros in Dragonstone in GoT? and those votive candles are the war pawns or whatever they call them.  Cutey Brooks gets the first 1 on 1 date. Des picks him up in her teal bentley and they head to a........bridal shop! perfect for a first date right?!?  Well Des is a dress designer so that makes a little more sense, maybe.  Des tricks Brooks into thinking he has to try on dresses too, he's a good sport about it and looks relieved when Des confesses it's just a joke.  Her trying on dresses doesn't seem so bad now does it buddy? Next, they stop by a cupcake truck (Charlotte needs more food trucks!!) and they get swarmed by excited fans. Side note:  I was so excited Emily was filming in my hometown during her season. My husband actually helped with the sound and lighting for a concert on the show, of course I went. There were a ton of screaming fans there and I didn't want to be that girl pushing and fighting my way to the front. no thanks, not for me, I will see it on tv.  I do know another former contestant from Charlotte but she's a bottle rat and I couldn't care less when I see her, shooo bar fly don't bother me.
Ok back to Des and Brooks, They have a picnic on the Hollywood sign, that's cool! that makes up for the bridal shop.  Night falls and they are driving through the city, what looks like the ghetto.  Brooks gets all white boy nervous when Des wants to take them down a deadend street.....Surprise! It's a romantic dinner on a bridge that they reused from Kalon and Lindzi's date last season on Bachelor Pad. The Exact same date, lighting, same freaking bridge I think.  I know ABC isn't hurting for money.  At dinner, Des asks Brooks how his parents divorce affected the way he sees marriage. Wow a legitimate question!  He wants what his parents didn't have, and be a father his father wasn't.  I think he will be in the final two, of course he gets a Rose!
Group Date- Solja Boy Video.
On this date- Dan(Jeff Probst lookalike), Juan Pablo, #Kasey, Zack(sneakers w/ suit), Token Will, Eyebrows Brain, Michael G (federal prosecutor), Drew(digital analyst), James (Jersey shore), Mikey T( T for Testosterone?), Shirtless Zak W, Charlotte Nick, Brandon (arrived on a motorcycle), and Ben with the son. The guys are going to be making a music video called "The right reasons". The Bachelor is basically spoofing themselves and their past contestants.  Making fun of guys on past seasons who weren't there for....yep you guessed it- the right reasons. Solja Boy comes out and he really does look like a boy, especially compared to some of these 'roided out guys.  Each guy attempts to rap freestyle and it's painful to watch. Des is goofy and she's looking for a guy who can make fun of himself, yep they'll be doing a lot of that!  Solja Bot picks Brandon, Michael, Ben and James as the "best" rappers, the rest of the guys are backup dancers. oh boy.  Ben is dressed as Wes from Jillian's season, the country singer who sang "Love don't come easy". James is Justin aka Rated-R, the wrestler from Ali's season.  They look very similar too! Michael G is Jason Messnick, he wasn't too bad of a guy? He was the Bachelor who just cried a lot from balconies, oh and switched girls at the end. He proposed to Melissa (Dancing with the Stars) but changed his mind after the finale and picked Molly, the runner up. Ouch. Brandon is Kasey- Mr. Guard and protect your heart, also from Ali's season (poor girl!). Brandon has to wear a shirt, vest and.....tighty whities? And embarrassingly shake his junk in front of Des. I'm confused as to how this getup relates to Kasey? All he did was sing cheesy songs, and spit out ridiculous sayings left and right. Des also gets a solo, while it's not as terrible as the guys, the whole song is just bad.  Later on in the night- Shirtless Zak gives Des a blank antique journal, it is actually very sweet and thoughtful. Zak wins some points here, but still has a weird face.  Ben steals Des away from Mikey Testosterone and he goes back to the guys to bitch.  Ben and Des talk for a while and he asks permission to kiss her.  Can't hate a guy for being chivalrous, I think Des likes him but I don't see a ton of chemistry.  Brandon oversees them kissing and starts to cry, he thinks he's falling in love with her, but is nervous to talk to her. Slow down buddy. Michael G tells Des that he's got her back....whatever that means.  Mikey T pulls Ben aside and tells him that he doesn't like him swooping in on his time with Des. Mikey obviously has never seen this show before, that's how this works guys, go steal her back! Ben says he won't stab him in the back and complements his shoes? way to go bro. Brandon finally works up the courage to talk to Des, he steals are away from Drew and no one seems to throw a hissy fit. Brandon talks about his childhood, he had it rough! Dad left, mom was an addict and never home so he had to raise his siblings. Poor guy. The group date Rose goes to Ben and the guys hate him even more. Hey guys, you're jealousy is showing.
2nd 1-on-1 Date-
Des picks Bryden (Iraqi war veteran) up at the house and they head up the coast of California. They stop for snacks and Brydens face lights up when she picks out the white cheddar cheese popcorn. Cute. They stop at a beach and attempt to fly a kite, no bueno. So they get lunch instead, fish tacos.  Up the coast some more they stop at an orange grove for a picnic. Dang this girl likes to eat! Bryden has never heard of brie before, maybe you should have stuck with the cheese popcorn Des. Later that night they have dinner at a resort and spa. Bryden pulls out some conveniently placed photos from his pocket of a car crash he was in when he was in college working construction. Ouch, it looked bad. Of course he gets the rose. They get in the hot tub and Des is giving him all the signals. Finally she says "just kiss me already" hahaha. Go Des. I like them two, they are cute. In my opinion, she has a stronger connection to Brooks, but he's going to stick around for a while. 

Cocktail Party-
Des is wearing an beautiful green dress, it makes her body look fantastic.  Michael G is the first to sit down with her. He tries to explain to her that he has diabetes, but Ben, who already has a rose this week from the group date, walks in and steals her away. Michael G already didn't like the guy, now he is for sure on his shit list.  It is rude to get alone time when you already have a rose and guys without rose's haven't gotten any time, but it happens every season! After Ben returns, all the guys are in the main room and Mikey Testosterone again gets all up in Bens business, Michael G then pulls him outside, Mikey and Nick follow them.  They chew him out but Ben doesn't understand the problem? He likes Des, He wants to talk to her? that's here for the right reasons. Ben walks away and the bitchfest kicks in full gear with the guys. These men gossip like women! They say he never talks about his son and only talks about his bar and owning his own company. Wait? didn't they just say he never talks to them? I just haven't seen anything horrible from Ben yet but the guys sure do hate him. Cut to Brian stealing Des away from Will, I guess the guys are too wrapped up in Ben to notice.  Anyways, back to Brian, he literally scoops Des up and takes her away, which I like but then he heads towards the pool acting like he's going to throw her in. FYI guys- Not cool!! Girls do not like that unless they have already been in the pool on a hot sunny day. Luckily, he does not throw her in. Instead they talk about his past relationships. His eyebrows/brow bone is really distracting, in a bad way. He says his last relationship was "a couple months ago" but it really ended 6 months ago. What? Red flag. Des is nodding on trying to comprehend. Body language- she's sitting on the opposite side of the couch, looks like a business meeting. He won't last long.

Rose Ceremony- James is called first,ugh, Kasey, Dan, Juan Pablo, Brad(no date yet), Chris, Brian ugh, Zak W, Drew, Mikey, Zack, Michael, and the last rose goes to...... Brandon.

Going Home- Will, Robert the sign spinner, and Nick from Charlotte.  They never really got any screen time anyway, and no exit tears.

My Top Picks- Brooks, Chris, Drew -they all seem to stay away from the Ben drama, I like that.

Next Week- Wrestling and cowboys? an ambulance, more Ben non-drama, and
The Girlfriend Scandal! Is it Brian? Ben's baby momma? We'll find out!

-Just my Jenuine opinion

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